BBS Moms Know Best: Dr. Heavenly
by Keyaira Boone
From managing a successful career in dentistry to launching a dating app Dr. Heavenly isn’t afraid of multi-tasking. In fact she got a head start on sharing positive messages with her daughter while she was still in the womb! She continues spreading the message of self-love by spending time encouraging young women to see their worth. This momprenuer sat down with Christina to talk about the importance of mentorship, dealing with public attention, and why she’s committed to being married to more than the medicine. You’re a known and flourishing entrepreneur as well as a family woman. How do you find balance? What are some tips for everyday working women who are moms? That is a question that people often ask me. The main thing is finding the priority. You know your priorities. Kids first, then your family, then your husband and then everything else. God first, then family, then your career. But the main thing in truth is trying to make time for everything. It helps me to try to organize my day the night before. Everything that is most important for me to get done, I jot it down. I used to write it down, but now I write it in my notes in my phone. How do you unwind? What are some of your favorite off-duty activities? I like to read books, I don’t watch much TV. But I’ll have a glass of wine or such, you know to wind down. It’s like now, I’m sitting outside and I’m sitting by my pool drinking a glass of wine. I just make time for myself, you have to make time, just time to just think. I think that is so important, we just need to make time and just sit down and think. Read on to find more about how Dr. Heavenly manages marriage, motherhood, and moguldom. Many of our readers are thinking about taking the leap to start new careers or to begin working for themselves. You do so many different things from launching a relationship/dating app to a successful career in dentistry. How do you successfully jump into a new industry when you have a background in another? You’ve heard it over and over again, “if you find your passion, something you’ll do for free, then it’s worth doing.” I say you can have it all, but you can’t have it ALL right now. If you’ve got a two-year-old, you can’t have it all right then. But you can have it all at least planned and take time for what you really enjoy. A lot of people say they’re jumping from the corporate America into their own businesses. My whole thing is, you’re going to work hard wherever you’re at. If you’re in corporate America working hard to keep your position, I would rather work hard in my own business or for my own business than someone else’s. You’re building someone else’s business. So work for yourself, and at the end of the day it’s yours. I started talking to my daughter when she was in the womb. I would read her positive books and things like that, so I started before she was actually born. My mother instilled a lot of things in me, it was drummed in my head to “be all you can be,” “always do your best,” “be the most that you can be” and “never be dependent totally on anyone”. I got a lot of backlash on the show for saying that I would never be dependent on my husband or anyone, and teaching my daughter the same. But these principles to me are biblical, you know that’s like almost insulting my religion. I’m telling my daughter that you put your trust in God. I have a great husband, don’t get me wrong and he is everything, but I just can’t tell my daughter to put all her trust into that. So I teach her to work hard and be all she can be. When you live your life and turn ninety you want to look back on it and say, “Hey, you know what, I did everything. I’m not afraid to do anything.” People say my daughter is sassy. But I teach her to speak her mind because when you get in business you can’t be shy, you can’t be fearful. You have to be able to be bold, and that’s the only thing that works. I love that you do mentorship with young girls. What has been your proudest moment as a mentor? When I teach a woman what her worth is, that is probably my proudest moment. You know I talk about relationships all the time so I’m able to encourage young women to know they’re worth. We have to tell women their worth because they’re giving their gift away so freely and we can control the world with our gift. I don’t know where society has gone wrong, and you know, I know people that mentor young men (that’s not my calling), but we have to mentor men to be men. The world is increasingly digital and things that didn’t exist in the past, like cyber-bullying for example, are now a parental concern. As a public figure, how do you protect your family from that? You know sometimes you have to think for yourself and not think about what other people say. A lot of people say that reality TV tears up families, and marriages and that has not been my experience. In fact I have done two seasons on reality TV and I feel like my husband and I are closer than ever. You can actually see on TV the love that we have for each other and we express it. But a lot of people usually want to say a lot of negative stuff. I think that half of the marriages are ended in divorce anyway. So if we’re on reality TV, then we’re actually doing better than the norm. I think it’s a blessing and a curse at the same time depending on who you are. For me it has been an absolute blessing because I never cared what people thought anyway. If you’re going to be a business leader or a leader in this world, you can’t really “be” without being able to be talked about. That’s one of the things that I’ve learned early. As far as flourishing on social media, I started out with seven followers. I did one season of “Married to Medicine” and I had 70,000 followers. So it’s definitely helped me and my business, as a dentist. I know some people say they don’t like reality TV for professionals but my business has flourished. For every one person that doesn’t like it, there’s probably ten that do. What I love seeing on the show is your interaction with your husband and the values you stress in your marriage. One being communication. After your conflict over you working too much, how did his feedback affect you and what tips can you give to other working wives who want success but don’t want their families to feel neglected? You know it always has to go back to compromise. You have to listen to your husband and make him feel important. Men need to feel needed. I stress that the man does not have to make the most money in the household, but he has to be the leader. If the husband can’t afford it don’t get it. A lot of people may not agree with me, but let the man lead. Let him be the leader, they need that. They need to feel like you’re listening to them, communicating with them and compromising. If you have a good husband that understands you, he’ll compromise with you. He wants you to be everything that you want to be. If it is your calling he knows that it is your calling, so he’ll support you and you’ll support him in everything you do. You know I got a lot of backlash saying that I submit to my husband, but at the end of the day, you have to submit to the right man. You submit to each other, he submits to me and I submit to him. It’s humbling yourself to make your marriage work.